Reasons Not To Steal Food From the Company Fridge

Reason #1 to Eat Lunch Out

Wow… where to start on this one.

1. Posted in a law firm kitchen.  Don’t those people make enough money?

2. Points for clever use of DNA. Bonus points for not making it clear exactly what he would be using as “seasoning”. Not knowing is always scarier.

3. Was this salad homemade or from a chain? I’m guessing it was homemade- because if you’re adding “DNA seasoning” to your lunchtime leftovers while at work, that is gross. And who steals homemade food out of the fridge anyway? You don’t know where that stuff came from, or how good a cook your co-worker is. If you are going to steal, stick to lunchtime leftovers from actual restaurants.

4. Finally, a tip for people with leftovers. Finish your damn food! Leftovers is never an issue with me…

50 Comments

  • Lymies are like old people: they smell funny, have poor dental hygiene and always show up uninvited. Didn’t we have a revolution to rid our country of them?

  • @ Joseph – it looks like you are either a professional sammy snatcher or have caught many sticky fingers before. I would probably just make a small tuna sandwich and chop up 10 scotch bonnet and leave it in the fridge. Just look for the person chugging water directly from the water dispenser.

  • I lived in a house in college that shared a communal kitchen and bathroom. Of course, there was this semi-crazy unemployed ‘artist’ dude who kept stealing everyone else’s food. It really cheesed me off because I was really poor. After talking with the guys in the house, I developed a plan. Bought a Coke, ground up some Ex-Lax tablets, inserted into Coke, told everyone else not to touch it if they valued their butts. Of course, he drank it that night, and of course he blew up the bathroom all night.

    Of course, one of my housemates thought it would be even funnier to hide the TP. Let’s just say the shower curtain needed to be replaced, and call it at that.

  • Our food thief turned out to be a partner who felt it was his due. I thought he would be embarrassed at being caught stealing staff lunches, but noooooooo. Using partner logic, the food was in his fridge in his firm and therefore his for the taking.

  • I is always a good idea to but your name on your food. This way people know who to thank for the meal.

  • It is always a good idea to but your name on your food. This way people know who to thank for the meal.

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    I don’t get why people do this. Are they really that savage? What’s so difficult to understand that, if you didn’t bring it, don’t eat it? Stealing lunches says A LOT about your personality, and I feel a prank to deter the thief is always justified. I think they are like klepto-food-maniacs, they don’t really any control over their scavenging abilities when it comes to food. And, they are too lazy to prepare their own lunch. People need to learn to control their appetite, period. Maybe then we would have less of a fat epidemic in the world. Personally, I never bring lunches to work. I think it’s undignified and unproductive, and I hate it when people I don’t know watch me eat. I have a very hard time eating alone in public places. So I always bring a bunch of healthy “snacks” as a lunch- fruits, vegetables, cheese, nuts. It’s good because a) it keeps me full b) easy to prepare c) inexpensive d) I eat eat while working and eat it at my own pace e) I don’t need to keep it in a fridge, I put it in my bag and f) it’s healthy. Alternately, I will bring a salad. But people don’t take salads. To those who say “calm down” this is not something to be “calm” about. It’s about people who take other’s lunches that they worked and earned the money to pay them, just so they can satisfy their need, but are deprived by it by some moron. Can you justify that? No. If you have no lunch, at least ask someone if they can share a little something with you. Politeness and courtesy is key here. Treat others the way you expect to be treated. Is that too hard to understand?

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