I Want to Be in the Fat Pack!

An interesting article was printed in the New York Times yesterday discussing the trend of proudly fat food writers and bloggers, some of whom have come to realize that their lifestyle is becoming dangerous to their health.  On one side, there are the “adults”, trying to balance their profession with unbridled love of food- heroes and good friends of Midtown Lunch like Ed Levine from Serious Eats, and Jason Perlow from Off the Broiler.  On the other side, you had your unrepentant fat guys like Josh “Cutlets” Ozersky from Grub St. & Seven Shaw from eGullet, unwilling to sacrifice one bit of their daily intake of burgers and pork fat.

As you can imagine, this article hit pretty close to home.  Can you guess which side of the argument I fall on?  The piece probably should have been a wake up call for me, a realization that there are others in the same predicament, who are working to balance being healthy with their love of chicharrones, for example.  Instead, I found myself thinking, “Why aren’t I in the fat pack?”  Like Ralph Wiggum wanting to attend “Bovine University” after watching the Beef Council video, I was left to wonder why nobody called me for this article.  I mean, what am I doing here people???  If eating disgusting lunches in Midtown can’t get you mentioned in an article about fat people who write blogs, I must be doing something wrong.  Am I not fat enough?  Do I need to start eating more?  Because, I can…

I admit that I’m not a tall man, and nobody would accuse me of having a “ex-football player” body (it’s more like an “ex-debate team member who ate too many doughnuts sold by the football players to pay for their jerseys” kind of body).  But I humbly ask that you allow me to join your club anyway.  I promise, I can do better.


  • Up with fat! Down with skinny! Abortions for all!

  • Woo for being an high school ex-debater!

  • First, start your day off with a chicharrone burrito (smothered in salsa verde, refried beans, cheese, topped with guac and sour cream)
    You may also add a fried egg inside and an order of hash browns.

    Then end each day with a garbage plate: a foundation of fries topped with chili beans, shredded pork, tons of cheddar and guac and sour cream. Plus, a pitcher of beer.

  • I think you need to send the Times daily lists of what you eat all day. Maybe then they shall realize the fat jewish kid is indeed worthy of being in the fat club.

  • But we’ve never seen a picture of you…how do we know you’re fat?

  • Sorry to blow your spot Zach but having seen some of the people in the fat club and having seen you. Dude. NOT FAT. Then again… heh heh heh I have a slightly skewed perception since a good friend of mine will call anyone with an extra 5 lbs. fat and I wait until it’s closer to 30 before I’ll shriek fatty boom batty! I grew up around overweight guys (my father and brother), though, so.

  • The Zen Burger review was the start of the slippery slope…then you had a salad for lunch…

  • I think the $10 limit is what is blowing your obesity goal – I mean, how fat can you really get on $10 a day for lunch? I bet emaciated models spend more. Maybe you need to start finding $5 lunches and having two. Or $2 lunches and having five. That’ll blow you up like a dirigible pronto.

  • This belongs on your inflation post of a few weeks ago, or maybe on the Moshe’s falafel cart post of a year or more ago, but I’m lazy, so I put it here:

    THE PRICE OF MOSHE’S FALAFEL WAS RAISED FROM $4.25 TO 4.75! Alert the media! The apocalypse is upon us.

  • totally unrelated to this post, the price of the Steak Filet Tips from the bar menu at Del Frisco’s has risen:

    $9.95 to $11.95.


  • Petrol going up,have to walk more.Food going up, have to eat less.

    Is the world ready for thin Americans?

    The french will have no put down rejoinders!!

    Vice Versa. Zach, 10 slices of 99c pizza might be an idea,every day for a month.

  • If it makes you feel any better, I read that article expecting a mention of you. Not that I have any idea how you measure up in terms of actual fatness, but your rhetoric fits right in.

  • Maybe you need to poast a photo of yourself…..

  • Yea I say we start a new one called, “We can eat like the fat pack”. One day, I’ll get there… more ice cream and bacon for breakfast, gimme a few more years…

  • If it makes you feel any better, I think you’re pretty gross.

  • I thought you said you bring a PBnJ a few times a week… That’s a good enough balance. Anyway, cheers for loving to eat and eating well, but Steven Shaw will be dead in a few years and it seems a little silly to kill yourself that way. Plus that noise he makes about diabetes being over-diagnosed? Not cool, nooge.

  • Zach, you may have to go on the Grocery Eats diet.

  • I finally figured out why you were snubbed. IT WAS THE NEW YORK TIMES! They don’t print anything useful any more unless it supports liberals, Al Sharpton or their failing business model! It’s the Wall Street Journal you want to get mentioned in, where men smoke cigars, eat rare meat and pack live ammo…

  • First wayne uses this forum to confess to masturbating to a coumn in the Village Voice. Now he’s posting his homo-erotic Republican fantasies.

    Wayne – find a woman (or a man, or a tranny) and have a go. The real thing is much better.

    Happy Purim everyone! Zach – no hamantaschen post?

  • Any port in a storm DDR… which are you? Eh, doesn’t matter, come over here and turn around are let me put my hands on your shoulders…

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