Slap Yo Mama vs. Trailer Park: Fried Chx & Waffle Battle to the (Possibly Literal) Death
Completely sick of food trucks? You might want to stop reading. Sick of food trucks with stupid names? Stop reading. Sick of gluttony? Stop reading. Sick of food bloggers getting excited about disgusting creations that nobody who doesn’t hate themselves would ever be caught eating? Stop reading. Hate fried chicken and waffles? Stop reading. Mom, is that you? Stop reading. Don’t want to see the food version of Leaving Las Vegas? Stop reading. Because if I die anytime in the next month, they will likely point to this lunch as a major cause. I’m not saying it will get blamed the way Marilyn Manson did for Columbine… actually, that’s exactly what I’m saying. The only difference is, this lunch will truly be to blame. Don’t want to throw up in your own mouth? Stop reading.
Last week I found myself at the recently re-opened food truck lot on Washington and Overland, and by some amazing bit of luck two trucks both serving fried chicken and waffles were parked side by side. Well, maybe “luck” is the wrong word for it. By some amazing bit of the-gods-conspiring-against-me-and-my-overall-health, the Slap Yo Mama Truck and the Trailer Park Truck were parked next to each other, making a fried chicken and waffle battle practically mandated by Fortuna. Aka, it had to be done. You know… for science.
The Trailer Park Truck, which is run by a former member of Sense Fail (Food is the New Rock anybody?), boasts “gourmet American comfort food” provided you find everything covered in cheese sauce to be comforting. They serve frito pie, a mac and cheese topped burger, and deep fried corn on a stick among other things. But I was there for “Aunt Mimi’s chicken and waffles” ($8).
Even though it didn’t say so on the menu, the dish comes out as a sandwich with two pretty gigantic white meat fried chicken tenders wrapped inside a pretty large but thin waffle (think, Roscoe’s thickness.) No fork or knife needed for this bad boy. The chicken tenders come already drenched in syrup, but still super crispy. You’ll likely be able to toss out that side cup of syrup, but make sure you hold on to the handi-wipe. You’ll be needing that when you’re done (even if you’re eating fried chicken and waffles from two different trucks.) It’s hard to fuck up syrup drenched fried chicken wrapped in a waffle, but even if I was the kind of person who had high standards when it comes to such things I still likely wouldn’t be able to find anything bad to say about this meal.
Interestingly enough, the Trailer Park Truck doesn’t advertise their fried and chicken and waffles as a sandwich, but what comes out is pretty much a sandwich. Slap Yo Mama, on the other hand, advertises a sandwich (a Snoop Dogg monikered Monte Cristo to be precise)- but what comes out can only be described as a monstrosity.
Can you in good conscience describe something as being “in between two waffles” when it is in fact just dipped into waffle batter!? At least I’m assuming that’s what they do. To be honest, I’m not even going to pretend to understand the engineering that goes behind creating this frankencristo. Oh, and in case you forgot there’s fried chicken AND mac and cheese inside that thing. Don’t believe me? (It is kind of unbelievable.)
Bam. That’s right. I ate that. I’m not proud of it. In fact, I’m kind of embarrassed about it. And not just because people were looking at me funny. Ok, it’s actually entirely because people were looking at me funny. I probably don’t need to tell you how it tastes. If you are the kind of person who thinks that syrup covered fried dough stuffed with fried chicken and mac and cheese tastes good you will think this tastes good. In fact, you will probably think this is the greatest thing you’ve ever tasted up until about 4 minutes after you take the final bite and your heart starts beating. Truthfully, there are worse ways to go. If you think even the idea of this is repulsive, then you are probably throwing up in your mouth right now. (Don’t say I didn’t warn you.)
That being said, these people know how to make fried chicken. In fact, even buried under all those layers of deep fried cheese covered guck, this fried chicken managed to shine through. So even though the Trailer Park Truck version might be the sensible choice (provided you want to live) and delicious in its own right, Slap Yo Mama’s fried chicken might have singlehandedly won the battle. It was so good, I’m thinking of going back and just trying their fried chicken sandwich (topped with collard greens, of course.) You know… for science.
Trailer Park Truck, follow on Twitter @trailerparktruk
Slap Yo Mama Truck, follow on Twitter @slapyomamatruck